Why Do I have this fire?

What a fire? PUT IT OUT! No, not that kind of fire silly. You know how it is, we are all humans, although many different looks, cultures , shapes and sizes, I feel there are things that are uniquely human such as the fire that lives within us. The fire that makes us as individuals decide to act, the fire that makes us wan to do something that we actually WANT to do. Why do we have that?

This fire inside me, it keeps pushing me to succeed. Ever since I was a child, success, that feeling of pure satisfaction within oneself, I have chased. I love to feel accomplished and to know that I DID IT MYSELF—–YES I MADE MYSELF FEEL HAPPY.

Now don’t get me wrong, I know that accomplishments should not be what out happiness in this world is based on. I mean, man, societies, have put specific values to different actions and they may see my accomplishment as a failure, and vice versa. However that’s a whole other discussion. I am talking about the fire that pushes us to follow after things that may not be the most practical, but we love it, the fire that makes us passionate about causes, the fire that can push us to accomplish what we normally would doubt when never tried. This fire is making me write every so often…this fire is making me feel as if I have so much more to offer to so many more people….this fire that you have too. Why do we have that?

 

 

❤ Stella

Conversations with the Demented

So on of my nights at work, I have decided to compile some of the strangest, sweetest and funniest things I have heard my elderly patients say in their demented state. Many times there are stories that are vividly being re-lived, good times remembered, and the occasional bad experience being brought back to the front of the mind. It is very interesting to listen and interact in the world of those with Alzheimer’s or Dementia, although very trying for the average individual. I guess that’s what makes me an awesome nurse, these conversations don’t scare me. I often times find myself pretending to be in their mind and wondering how this world they are living in appears to these patients.

“…He was so gentle and kind, like a true gentleman. And he did it just like that, being so kind he taught me how to dance!”

“…you couldn’t even go to your little babies birthday party…you had to drink! You should just be ashamed of yourself. ”

“I gotta carry all this right up that mountain hill.”

“I can’t live like this, I’ve done it for 25-30 years and that’s enough!”

“…make an asshole out of me huh…yeah right…”

“…All my money’s gone, everything’s out! you better get up here fast because I’m going out of town and I aint got no money. Spend it spend it spend it, spend it on you spend it on her….yeah I do look cute don’t I? You don’t like what I’m talking about huh, and I know it.”

” I changed my mind….I would never babysit you.”

” I am NOT going on welfare. I am 94 years old and I CAN WORK!”

I am only approaching 30 this year, but these individuals have inspired me to collect more quotes and to be HONEST and OPEN about MY feelings instead of being what this society wants me to be. Yes there is always truth in what the demented say……